Charlotte

It's starting to hit me that Ethan's going to Charlotte in the fall. I know it's really because of me that he's going... he's told me numerous times that if it wasn't for me, he'd already be in Afghanistan by now. But it's just starting to sink in that in just a few short weeks, he won't be a short drive from me. We won't be seeing each other a few times a week, or ever once a week, for the next year. I thought that I would be the absolute saddest about Lukas leaving in the fall, but I've barely seen him all summer anyway. I'm already starting to adjust to not having him around which is probably a good thing because college and a new social scene will end up taking up most of his time.

I need a change. I wish I would have known what I was going to do a year ago... I could be graduating THIS semester. I can't wait to just get out of this house, be around new friends and be content. It's totally fine. I'm allowed to have self pity every once in awhile.