Yesterday was a very long, emotional day. I woke up early and met E's mom, Kyle and Lydia in Lincolntona and together we made the long drive back to Laurinburg to Ethan's deployment ceremony. It was a simple drive filled with nervous energy, excitement and dread. I convinced myself that I had no choice but to stay strong and I think I did I pretty good job.
The ceremony was short, uneventful and to be honest, slightly cheesy. There was singing of "American Soldier", exchanging of the flag and a short speech by higher ups whose names I don't recall. At the end, we got our soldier for the afternoon and went to dinner with him, Chad & Lisa and Taylor.
When we got back to the hotel, there was a moment of pure terror when I realized I had to say goodbye. We made it quick, and I cried only a little bit. Maybe it's because I might get to see him in Texas next month or maybe it's because I didn't want him to see my tear up, but being strong was my only option.
I miss my husband. I miss my marriage. I miss his touch and his mood and his way of completely and totally captivating me.
I can already tell I hate this deployment.
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