I just want to cry. I already am, actually but I want to cry harder and it isn't even that big of a deal. I'm probably being dramatic and selfish but I don't even care. My sister moved into an apartment with me while E is deploying and for the most part it's working out really, really well. There have been a few issues that we've had to work through but nothing that isn't typical of sisters trying to share the same space. Before she moved in, she told me that she wasn't a dog walker and that mine and E's dog was not her responsibility... which I thought was a bit harsh but I didn't expect her to take care of her in the first place so I didn't mind. Well, the other day I was running late from work and I called to see if she could take her out for me...granted, we do live in an apartment so she has to put her on a leash and walk her across the road to a grassy field but it's literally a five minute trip if my dog has to go badly and I knew she did. So I get home and my sister acted like she had to build a bridge and knit a leash in order to take her out and told me that she'd never do it again.
Well also, every time she has friends over, she makes me put the dog up in her crate or shoves her in my room and closes the door because, "I have to respect that she has friends who don't like dogs." ALSO understandable, although this is my dog's apartment too. Actually it's my dogs apartmet BEFORE it's hers. ANYWAY.
Tonight my mom stopped by the apartment, and I asked her if she wouldn't mind taking the dog home with her for the night because 1) my sister was having people over all night 2) We, including my dog, lived with her until a month ago so she's to her and 3)I would be gone all day tomorrow... 12+hours. I never work that long but tomorrow is a HUGE day. I'm an interim executive director and tomorrow is my first board meeting that I lead... it happens once a month after work. They'll also be voting on whether or not to hire me permanently. Even though they've probably already made their decision, I'm a nervous wreck. I just didn't want to have to worry about leaving work every few hours to come take the dog out. Well, my mom gave me a hard time and I just about burst into tears. My sister and mom were both acting like it just wasn't their problem... and I get that it isn't.... but I just needed some help. My sister knows its a big day and could have said, "don't worry about it. I'll help you out for the night." but she didn't. My mom finally gave in and took her after I just said, "I didn't realize getting help was so hard. I'm trying to handle it on my own, you tell me to ask for help if and I need and you get made when I do. I'll figure it out." I could tell she felt bad but as soon as she left I just burst into tears.
Even now, I'm sitting in my room miserable because I love that dog more than anything. I wish she were here because she really does keep me company. I know Ethan is still in the states but he's still mobilized... he's leaving SO soon and no, we don't have kids, but my God. Sometimes a dog is like a kid! I just needed a little help! I'm having to HIRE someone to watch my dog WHILE MY SISTER IS HOME when I go see him in two weeks for 4 days in Texas before he leaves... I can't believe my own sister won't volunteer to give me a break.
:( I guess when your husband deploys and before he leaves you hear, "don't worry! we'll help you! you're not alone!" you ALMOST believe it until reality smacks you in the freaking face.
And I'm not even going to get started on how she waits until my mother gets here to mention that she doesn't feel like this is her apartment because all my things are here. Guess what? I left the living room empty for THREE WEEKS. If you don't put your pictures out or you don't buy things to decorate, don't get mad when I do. Don't get mad that I put up FOUR pictures of me and my husband when I have no other option but to look at his face on paper instead of in person. Don't get mad when I put my dog's paw print art on the tv hutch when it was otherwise EMPTY. I want to live in a home... not a dorm room!
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